The Courage to Be Afraid: Navigating Fear in Brave Spaces
One of the most frequent and enjoyable parts of my work is talking with a wide range of audiences about brave space, the framework I developed with my friend and collaborator Kristi L. Clemens to help diverse groups of people have richer and more sustainable dialogues about diversity, equity, inclusion, social justice, belonging (DEIJB), and related issues. People really resonate with the idea of bravery and understandably want to dive right in, but I've found that we need to start by talking about fear. It's a fundamental part of the human experience, and understanding it is key to unlocking true bravery.
When we consider figures who have stood up for justice, we often label them "fearless." But were they really? Consider the quiet bravery of Ruby Bridges, walking into a hostile, segregated school in 1960. Or the late Edward Crawford, whose iconic photograph captured him standing against powerful forces during protests for racial justice in Ferguson. Or the late Sylvia Rivera, who bravely demanded trans inclusion even when faced with hostility from within her own community. These moments of defiance aren't born from an absence of fear, but from a profound understanding that something is more important than that fear.
I believe bravery isn't the absence of fear; it's the acknowledgment of that fear and then acting despite it. Fear is what makes bravery meaningful; it's the very foundation of it. This is a critical distinction, especially when we talk about creating and navigating brave spaces, a concept grounded in DEIJB values but applicable in any context where the subject matter is controversial or contentious.
Why is this distinction so important?
First, it normalizes fear. When we're talking about DEIJB issues, or any other contentious matters, there are real risks involved: loss of credibility, relationships, jobs, safety, even lives. Given these constantly escalating stakes, fear is a natural, understandable response. Pretending otherwise is unhelpful and unrealistic.
Second, we need to stop perpetuating the myth that true DEIJB advocates are "fearless." When we call someone fearless, we're really recognizing their tenacity, strength, and commitment. But we forget that these qualities can coexist with fear. By ignoring this, we set unrealistic expectations for ourselves and others, creating unnecessary self-doubt. We tell ourselves that feeling fear means we're somehow inadequate, and pass similar judgment on others.
It's a lot like the concept of psychological safety, which is often discussed in leadership and organizational development circles. While I’m critical of the way we use the words "fearless" and "safe" in these contexts, I'm a huge fan of the concept of psychological safety itself. I actually see brave space as a bridge that can lead to psychological safety; this is a topic I plan to explore more deeply in an upcoming post. For now, it's enough to know that both concepts share a core guiding principle: creating an environment where people can show up fully and engage in difficult conversations.
Third, naming fear enhances our empathy as facilitators and participants. Understanding our own fear allows us to recognize and validate the fear in others. This is critical in DEIJB work, where participants often confront deeply emotional challenges. To support them, we must be attuned to and acknowledge these feelings, understanding that the fear experienced by those with marginalized identities is fundamentally different from the fear of those in dominant groups. These differences must be understood and addressed with sensitivity.
I've had my own experiences with fear in these spaces. I remember one particular workshop on race and racism where participants were talking about these issues as though Black and White were the only racialized identities. As an Asian American, I hesitated to speak up. I believed deeply in the importance of dedicating focus to the specific dynamics of anti-Blackness and white supremacy, but I also feared that my experiences, and those of other APIDA people, would be discounted or minimized. This dynamic plays into the model minority myth and harmful zero-sum approaches to racial justice. It was only by remembering my courageous Japanese American role models, like Fred Korematsu and Yuri Kochiyama, that I was able to speak up and contribute meaningfully. I'm very glad I did, because it helped move the dialogue toward a fuller consideration of race and racism and the ways in which the struggles of all communities of color are linked rather than in opposition.
My experiences with fear aren’t limited to my marginalized identities. In my first formal learning experience about transgender identities, I had so many questions about respectful terminology, but I was terrified to ask them. I was afraid my dominant group identity as a cisgender person would cause me to be seen as ignorant. It was a selfish desire to be seen as a "good cisgender person” that was holding me back. I had to remember that the whole point of the workshop was to teach people about transgender identities, and that it takes courage to be vulnerable and ask questions, even when you are in a dominant group. Acknowledging my own ignorance allowed me to align my words with my values of trans equity and inclusion.
I share these experiences in hopes they might help you reflect on your own journey. By understanding and embracing our fears, we can cultivate the bravery needed to create truly inclusive spaces.
For a deeper dive, I invite you to consider these reflection questions in the comments below. Sharing your insights is a powerful way to continue this conversation and learn alongside one another.
Recall a time you felt fearful to engage in a group learning setting due to a marginalized or minoritized identity. What triggered that fear? Were you able to act bravely? What was the result?
Recall a time you felt fearful to engage due to a dominant group identity. What caused that fear? Were you able to act bravely? What was the result?
I look forward to hearing your insights.
Traveling Song - “Strength Courage & Wisdom” by India.Arie
This tune has been a long-time fixture on my "brave space playlist" (yes, I have one) and feels like a perfect fit for this post. I've always admired India.Arie's artistry and her willingness to be fully herself, even when it wasn't the easy or obvious choice. This song is all about acknowledging fear and discovering the inner resources to speak your truth.
Inside my head, there lives a dream
That I wanna see in the sun
Behind my eyes, there lives a me
That I've been hiding for much too long
'Cause I've been too afraid to let it show
'Cause I'm scared of the judgment that may follow
Always putting off my living for tomorrow
It's time to step out on faith
I've gotta show my face
It's been elusive for so long
But freedom is mine today
I've gotta step out on faith
It's time to show my face
Procrastination had me down
Look what I have found, I found
Strength, courage, and wisdom
It's been inside of me all along
